August 26, 2008

No Shirt, No Shoes, No Table

powpowpow.jpgI think somebody should mark this, the official jump-the-shark moment for McCain's "POW Defense." Guy goes on Leno, knowing he'll be ribbed about the "houses" gaffe, and this is the strategy:

McCain noted that the "house is nice," a reference to the White House.

"You've got enough of those," Leno cracked. "You need a white one, too." Later, he asked McCain: "For $1 million, how many houses do you have?"

At that, McCain got serious, saying he had been imprisoned for five-and-a-half years during the Vietnam war, and that "I didn't have a house. I didn't have a kitchen table. I didn't have a table."

That's it. POW. Splash. From here on, he can continue to use it, but he'll be part of a running gag, joining everybody else in coming up with new one-liners on the theme...

Posted by Vance


And how's this for a well-thought-out comeback...?

"I'm proud of my record of service to this country, and it has nothing to do with houses," McCain said. "It has to do with putting Americans in houses and keeping them in their homes."

Well, um, if it has to do with putting Americans in houses, then it does... have... something to do with houses, no?

"No one's going to confuse John McCain with those arugula-eating latte-sipping liberals! Because during his five years as a POW, he subsisted only on a thin rice gruel and all the bugs and vermin he could catch."

A reminder that McCain didn't have cereal for 5 years -


"Consistent and truthful answers to questions? For five years as a POW I did my best to confuse Charlie by always giving different answers."

"Keating 5 years in a Vietnamese prison cell!"

Is this the pat answer whenever he gets in a bind regardless of context?

Did your wife act as financial intermediary for the Keating Five?

Pity me. I didn't have a checkbook when I was in the gulog.

Did you call your wife a cunt?

Pity me, I had no access to snatch while I was in the prison camp.

Look at these shoulders for Christ sake. I can't reach the good crystal and have to drink right out of the fucking milk carton. And for that, I deserve to be president.

Senator - did you call your wife a trollop?

My friends, for 5 years as a POW I had no Trollope, no Dickens, no Bronte.

McCain: For 5 years Charlie made me sleep in my own shit...Now it's your turn.

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