Jurors deliberated less than five minutes before returning guilty verdicts in the trials of the first two defendants, who were accused of grooming the kids for sex shows in "kindergarten" classes and passing off Vicodin as "silly pills" to help the children perform. [The five-year-olds] were trained to perform in front of an audience of 50 to 100 once a week.
Then they took a hot air balloon to the moon and were sodomized by Chuck Norris.
The trial of a third defendant was delayed after it came out that two reporters covering the case had been sleeping with the prosecutor.
