Submit the worst possible caption for this New Yorker cartoon. Click here for details. Click here to see last week's results.
NOW WITH PRIZES! Bring your A-game, folks. The winner and finalists in this week's contest will receive autographed copies of THE COUP, Jamie Malanowski's new satirical novel. (To be eligible, you must provide a working e-mail address (only I will see it) and be prepared to provide a real name and address. If one or more of the winning entries are not eligible, the prize(s) will be rolled over to next week's contest.)
Winner
"Why, I just got out of a toxic relationship, and I could really use a drink! No, but seriously, there was a chemical spill over on 43rd and hundreds are dead. I'm surprised you haven't heard." �J
Finalists
"My wife left me for some guy that doesn't wear a radiation suit. How can I compete with that?" �Ed C
"Man, I am so wastered. I mean wasted. Well, back to work." �mypalmike
Honorable mention
"I just came from the big rally to keep 'Jericho' on the air, but suddenly I feel empty and ashamed, so I'm going to drink myself into oblivion. Thanks for asking." �gary
"They told me this bar was 'da bomb.' But it turns out 'da bomb' actually fell a mile from here. Hence my protective suit, and your impending agonizing death from radiation sickness. Cheers." �Jacob C
"So, we were chasing that alien and the kid down a cul-de-sac. We were sure we had them! But then - and you're not gonna believe this - the alien and the kid and the bicycle suddenly levitated in the air and they started flying! Geez-o-man, do I need a drink!" �kejo
"Is that CK One you're wearing? What a coincidence!" �Trout Almondine
"Radiation symbol? Goddamnit! I'm so totally killing my tailor. It was supposed to be a swastika! Oh how the hell am I gonna look at the big cross-burning tonight?!" �TG Gibbon
"yes, i am part of a word-of-mouth viral marketing "street" team doing a stunt for the latest hollywood virus-outbreak movie. but you have to wear a suit to work every day, so suck it, plastic ad man." �plastic ad man
"No negroes are allowed in here at all? You mean I wasted all that time and money getting suited up like this?" �Vance
"I prefer 'Bubble Man' actually." �Feige
"I CAN HAZMAT?" �The Confidence Man
