November 1, 2006

Come to think of it, I don't miss 2004

By the end of the 2004 elections I was persuaded that John Kerry would make a good president. I still think that's true. But he'll clearly never be a good candidate, and for better or worse, that's a prerequisite. How the fuck did he let this become front page news less than a week before an election the Democrats actually have a shot at winning?

If there's a silver lining, maybe it's that this will convince the party to shut him out in 2008. Now if only Hillary would shoot herself in the foot before the Republicans have a chance to shoot her in the head.

I'm still holding out hope for Edwards -- and I'm even willing to give the New Al Gore of a few months ago a look -- but Blank Obama may be the best bet. I wonder if he'd be as good a president as he is a candidate.

Update: It should go without saying that the Republicans are cynically making a mountain from a mole hill here. That's what they do (or, less partisanly, that's what happens in politics). That's why I blame Kerry fault for making the mole hill in the first place, and for handling the response so ineptly. First, the joke itself was a cheap attempt to generate attention. Congratulations, it worked. Second, if you're not capable of telling a joke, don't attempt it. Third, the joke wouldn't have been funny if it landed, and didn't even have a sound premise. Even if you're of the Bush-is-dumb school (and I'm not), it was clearly not his lack of intellect that got us stuck in Iraq. The chief architects of the war -- Cheney, Rumsfeld, Wolfowitz, et al -- are all indisputably smart folks. Then Kerry botched his counter-response, first refusing to apologize, then doing so repeatedly and lamely, setting up the genuinely funny line that he was for the joke before he was against it. But what really pissed me off was his insulting first try at a response. "The White House’s attempt to distort my true statement is a remarkable testament to their abject failure in making America safe. It’s a stunning statement about their willingness to reduce anything in America to raw politics.” Yes, how dare they reduce my joke about the president at a campaign rally to raw politics.

Posted by Daniel Radosh


Ugh. I know. Out of the choices of possible runners I think I'd go with the Neo-Green Gore. I was starting to think twice about outright dismissing Kerry, but I rethought my rethinking - well, something like that.

What gets me is: Couldn't he wait to say something this ridiculously stupid until after the election? I don't care about how un-presidential he is, now (or in 2008); I care that it's the sort of dumb thing that seems to mobilize red-leaning yokels.

Then again, I was worried the latest Eastwood film would somehow encourage another go at that retarded flag-burning amendment.

Well, he obviously never learned the old chestnut about the most important thing in comedy.

Now if only Hillary would shoot herself in the foot

I worry that she will indeed shoot herself in the foot several times but will have so much momentum into 08 that she'll still be there, limping pathetically along, carrying the Democrats to a sound defeat.

The Democrats in gerneral are killing me--They seem intent on burying their best canidates (Edwards) while throwing old war-horses like Kerry back out there--Dude, a dissatisfied electorate couldn't bring itself to vote for you enough the last time around against an incumbent that was on the ropes. Shut up and go away!! You're like the Bob Dole of the Democratic Party, only without that deft comedic timing we've come to expect from o' Sen. Boner-Gro

Looks like Kerry may have some competition from Bush if this Times headline is to be believed: "Bush, Trying to Rally Base, Defends Rumsfeld."

Nothing like drawing attention to your failures to bring home a win.

Agreed 100%, Dan.

Though it's probably too late for my ponies-prancing-under-a-rainbow scenario, I still think Jon Bon Jovi is the Dems' ideal candidate.

Who cares whether or not John Kerry screwed up a joke? Who cares if it wasn't funny? Did he commit a bloody sin? And, is he on any ballot? While GW runs his fat mouth with TRASH LIMBAUGH insisting that anyone who doesn't agree with the "Burning Bush" is an anti-american, terrorist humping, atheist, Americans are out there scratching their heads wondering what in the hell all of the hullabaloo is about. Now let me consider what's worse: a stupid joke made by a senator from MA or the President of the United States consorting with a radically right wing radio station commentator addicted to narcotics; a man who has made obvious racist comments; a man who blantantly lies about making fun of an actor who has Parkinson's Disease; and a man who IS nothing but a rotting spirit -- a far cry from GW's alleged Christian right beliefs!
Bush & Company are obviously spinning the web. I only hope that inside of the web the black widow turns out to be a JackAss and her prey the Elephant!

Hmmmm. Your cogent wordplay has made me reconsider my position.

Kerry in '08!

You had me at "!"

Teresa Heinz Kerry is a widow and she is from Africa.

Or maybe Stephanie Stubbs Jones. Either way. It's all good.

Maybe Rush will be the big loser in all this. He's done some very nasty things lately. Anyone know how his ratings are doing?

"Who cares whether or not John Kerry screwed up a joke?"

Besides all the candidates he was originally scheduled to campaign for this week?

Wait-- what is the most important thing in comedy?


Thank you for the perfect setup for that punchline.

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