July 11, 1988

Now if someone would just invent a graphical interface for the Internet I might actually get credit for this scoop

My sources at Hampton Day School Camp tell me a certain pissant who happens to be the son of Carl Bernstein has been blabbing to his little friends that he's "100% certain" Deep Throat is W. Mark Felt. Well, duh. It's been painfully obvious to me that Felt was candidate #1 ever since '72 when Woodward told Tim Crouse that "somebody at Justice" was pointing him to Haldeman. I doubt Jacob Bernstein's friends will understand the dynamite potential of this information the have for at least another 10 or 11 years, but Jacob himself clearly has a future in gossip ahead of him.

Posted by Daniel Radosh


Daniel -

You couldn't be more wrong. I'm utterly certain that Deep Throat is Alexander Haig. Just you watch, I'm sure this is gonna come out in the next couple years or so. You're gonna be so embarrassed.

Oh, BTW, you have some kind of weird glitch with this on-line-diary thing where comments seem to be mis-timestamped by about 17 years.

Well, the technology is still pretty new, you know. By the way, on-line-diary is so clunky. Isn't there some cool contraction we can use? I got it: Onliary.

That coinage is gonna sweep the Onliarsphere.

"onliary" is missing something. since it's electric, why not "e-onliary"?

Y'know, there's this term "cyber" that William Gibson uses in a book that came out about 4 years ago called NewRomance or something - I think that should be used instead of "e." ("e" is never gonna catch on as a standalone prefix; everybody will think you're talking about Ecstasy!)

So: Cyber-onliary, or for short, Cybonly. Or for shorter, bone. "Nice bone you got here."

So this is how it feels to know then what I know now. I'd better warn my best friend not to go snowboarding in 12 years, or he'll have an accident and become paralyzed.But first I should get myself a cane, so the bouncers at the Hollywood Paladium won't mistake me for drunk, and throw me out of the Iggy Pop concert. Gee, there's so much to do!

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